I am a planner, a scheduler, an organizer. I like my routines, my calendar, and knowing what's ahead. I like to be in control of changing those plans according to what would be more suitable, make more sense, etc. So what happens when I feel control has been taken from me and plans I've made months ago suddenly get cancelled ... because of someone else's plans, circumstances, schedule etc? Well, first I feel frustrated and angry. Then some bitterness creeps in. Blame shows up. And I want to withhold grace.
That looks ugly. I certainly don't want to sit with that stuff and let it take over. What if I were open to hearing what Jesus has to say about it? What if I were attentive to what the Holy Spirit is showing me and teaching me that I could only learn and experience if I were right here instead of where I had planned to be?
These are things that I can only receive answers to if I ask. So ask is what I did. And over the next few days I opened myself to learning, experiencing and following what Jesus had for me. I find when I am open to it, I am awakened to his presence and activity, even in the smallest of things.
Would I have experienced the goodness of the Holy Spirit if my original plans had gone ahead? Quite possibly. Am I disappointed that parts of my plans had to be cancelled? Absolutely. Am I satisfied with what I have been learning and feel complete with what I've received so far? I'm still working on it.
-Candice
1 comment:
I often forget that when my plans get cancelled but God's aren't that he has good in store for me, I often get caught up in my frustration rather than turning my face towards his. good words. thanks again.
p.s. you suit your deck chairs very well. it is sooo "candice" to see you relaxing in a pink/purple(?) chair with your coffee in hand. I so wish the summer could last longer!!
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